Patsy Porco

You Can Now Afford New Underwear … or a Divorce

In Humor on February 21, 2011 at 3:32 pm

Over the years, my husband and I have remarked that it was a good thing that we got along, because we couldn’t afford a divorce. I recently heard the same sentiment expressed on the sitcom, “The Middle.”

It’s no surprise to hear that the state of your finances determines your lifestyle. If you have no discretionary income, then you probably shouldn’t buy a Porsche, even if you can find a bank that will let you. For many people, discretionary income has become increasingly rare.  But that might be changing. Just as a robin’s appearance heralds spring, there are indicators of an improving economy, and those signs are slowly emerging (like that fraudulent groundhog emerged a few weeks ago, but these signs are more believable than Phil’s prediction of an early spring).

According to an article on Yahoo! (, people are beginning to spend money on nonessentials, which means that more people have jobs, or at least have higher hopes of getting a job than they did in the recent past. So, what are they spending their money on? Top items include men’s underwear, dessert, designer coffee, taxis, golf, gambling, cosmetic surgery, and divorces.

The good news here is that men are buying underwear again. I shudder to think of what they were wearing, or not wearing, during the really tough times. I remember Jerry Seinfeld once said that men wear their underwear until it disintegrates. So, if men are suddenly realizing that it’s time to stock up on underwear, it’s safe to say that the bad economy dissolved their briefs. And we were worried about the effects of global warming.

The other things that money is being spent on are self-indulgences, some more indulgent than others. I’m not exempt here. I will occasionally treat myself to an expensive coffee to perk up my spirits or take a cab while in Manhattan. But I will now definitely think twice before laying out the money. After all, during cash-strapped days, I managed quite well with Folger’s homemade coffee in a travel mug, and the subway got me to where I needed to go. But treating yourself is a huge spirit booster, and if you can now afford to go to a restaurant and have dessert, or play a few rounds of golf, then why not? You’ll feel happier, and if you walk from hole to hole on the course, you’ll even get some healthful exercise.

You have to wonder, though, if anyone who had to delay his or her trip to the casino or plastic surgeon realized that the trip could be delayed indefinitely. And perhaps a marriage or two will survive because spouses had to learn how to coexist peacefully whether they wanted to or not.

There are lessons to be learned from hard times, like the difference between what we truly need and what we merely want. And what we truly need and want is for men to buy and wear underwear … during the good times and the bad.


  1. I didn’t know that wearing underwear was a choice! Now I’m glad I never try pants on in the store and wash them before I wear them.

  2. You’ve never gone “commando”?

  3. My boss lady never wore under pants AND yet she wore a skirt or dress almost everyday. Our office were next door to a fancy SF hotel. She slipped on the tile outside of the hotel, fell on her butt and her skirt went over head. Straddled there, skirt over head, after a brief pause, the door man lent her a hand. She thought it was a riot, and as far as I know she still goes cammando.

  4. […] You Can Now Afford New Underwear … or a Divorce « Patsy Porco&#.. […]

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s


Food, Road Trips & Notes from the Non-Profit Underground

Dispatches from the Asylum

“The story so far: In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and been widely regarded as a bad move.” ― Douglas Adams

Chomp Chomp

Food & Dining


Cooking and More


It contains the world best places and things.


Dabbles in writing, loves music and nature. Sierra Leonean

Amber & Corde

A journey of expanding my dog's world

Frank Solanki

If you want to be a hero well just follow me

Elan Mudrow

The Ridges of Intertextuallity

The Renegade Press

Tales from the mouth of a wolf


This site a journey through 2014 - Body and Soul

Leonard's Lines

A world without humor just isn't funny.


The Cricket Pages

Ben's Bitter Blog

"We make bitter better."


What they never taught me in teacher school.




World through my lens

Happiness Between Tails by da-AL

Arts + Cooking + Dancing + Joy + Writing + Tales + Tails


Sabbles woz 'ere

Life In Our Little LA Garden

Spending time in our urban oasis planting seeds and talking about it

Waking Muses

A Creative Writing Project

The Shameful Sheep

shit storms, shame, and stories that make you cringe

The Blog

The latest news on and the WordPress community.

Mara Eastern

I hope to be hysterically hilarious. But maybe I'm just hysterical.


In the sea of dreams.

Bluestem Pond

Diary of the creation of Bluestem Pond Farm


52 weeks. 52 pies.

The Daily Post

The Art and Craft of Blogging

New York Sports Roundup

A fine site


Nancy Roman


A little about everything, a lot about nothing.

The Blog

The latest news on and the WordPress community.

%d bloggers like this: