Patsy Porco

Don’t Try This at Home … Unless You’re on a Sitcom

In Humor on July 29, 2013 at 10:31 pm

I just watched a show where the main characters went to an elegant party. Two of them got blindingly drunk. One kissed the host and passed out on top of him. The other spent the evening knocking things out of people’s hands. The sober character felt insulted by something the host said, so she stole an expensive bowl in retribution.

The next day, they thought the whole evening was a riot. If they were living in real life, they would also be laughing … in prison or rehab. Civilized people don’t find drunks or thieves amusing, unless they’re actors in a ridiculous situation on a TV show. Life would be more entertaining if it imitated sitcoms, but it rarely does.

To prevent against your life imitating art (or sitcoms), you’d probably be better off watching violent movies than TV comedies. You’re less likely to find yourself being pursued by bloodthirsty foreign assassins than finding yourself at a party where opportunities abound to drink heavily, steal bowls, and pass out on your host.

It’s your call. Life’s a gamble. But it’s definitely not a sitcom. Just ask my probation officer.

  1. I hate to be a prude – but I hate any play, movie or TV show where it is cute to be drunk. Drunks are never cute – no matter how much they may think they are.

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