Patsy Porco

Photos Are for Display Purposes Only

In Humor on November 28, 2016 at 1:16 am

Sometimes life takes an unexpected turn. You expect one thing and get another. For instance, tonight, I checked out one of the online community tag sale sites I belong to. I expected to scroll through the latest sale items, see something I liked or not, and click off the site. I did not expect to laugh out loud when I read the comments under an ad for workout pants. Here’s the post. People are nuts.

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New Jersey State of Mind

In Humor on November 24, 2016 at 1:22 am

“Everyone driving to work in the morning is either drowsy or drunk,” claims my brother, Gus.

He recently moved to New Jersey, where there is a huge public service campaign against drowsy driving. It’s now a punishable crime there if you kill someone in a car accident and you were tired at the time. Drowsy driving might be tough to prove, though. I don’t know about you, but I would certainly be wide awake by the time the police questioned me. And I probably wouldn’t mention that I was previously a little sleepy.

Distracted driving is also a big worry in New Jersey. A few months ago, a bill was introduced in the New Jersey legislature that, if passed, would allow people to be ticketed for not paying attention while they were driving. Everyone was up in arms that they wouldn’t be able to drink coffee while they drove. It hasn’t come up for a vote yet, and the assemblyman who introduced the bill said that he had introduced it before and, back then, everyone was worried that they wouldn’t be able to eat a sandwich while driving. It was called the “ham sandwich bill.” This time around, it’s called the “coffee bill.”

Now here’s the conundrum: If you take away drivers’ coffee, there will be more drowsy drivers. If you don’t, you’ll have drivers who glance at their coffee cups, or their joints, occasionally. What’s a state to do?

coffee-cup

Election Day Questions

In Humor on November 8, 2016 at 12:44 pm

Janet Reno, the first female U.S. attorney general, died yesterday. If she took advantage of early voting, does her vote count if she’s not alive on Election Day?

If it counts, is it fair to the people who didn’t get the opportunity to vote early and died before November 8, 2016?

If it doesn’t count, is that fair?

If I were a dishonest politician in a tight race in a state with early voting, I’d visit nursing homes right before Election Day and offer to help residents cast their votes. I’d even help them decide who to vote for, and mail their ballots for them.i_voted_today_sticker-r5853b35a1d1f4e3d8b2299e21bc33889_v9wth_8byvr_512

 

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